As if trying to meet someone that you’re attracted to, compatible with, and interested in isn’t hard enough…add a couple bad dates into the mix and you may want to throw the towel in on dating altogether. After a bad date, you start thinking to yourself “Maybe being single isn’t that bad after all” or “Why me?!” Trust me, I get it! I, myself am no stranger to the bad date. In fact, I can remember one quite vividly that sent me home in tears by the end of the night (I’m highly emotional, don’t judge me). Looking back on it now, I definitely would’ve handled that situation differently. But hey, you live and you learn right? If that horrible date never happened, I wouldn’t be able to share some of my knowledge with you!
Let’s be honest, most dates don’t necessarily start out bad. There are a ton of factors that could make a date take a turn for the worst. Maybe the attraction is not what you expected, the conversation is just as bland as ever, you two have opposing political views, maybe too much liquor was consumed, or there’s confusion about who should pay the bill. Whatever it is, don’t beat yourself up about it! It happens to the best of us.
Don’t let a shitty date turn you completely off. Dating can be really fun and enjoyable if you allow it to! There’s a beauty in being able to bounce back from a setback. So if you ever find yourself on a bad date, here are some things you can do to help you get through it:
1. Be sure to have an open mind.
Ok maybe this person isn’t what you expected (physically, intellectually), or perhaps they’re wearing one of the ugliest shirts you’ve ever seen. I get it, first impressions are important. But people are prone to miss the mark and not make the best judgment calls. Try to be a little understanding and take the unnecessary pressures off the date.
2. Keep the conversation going.
Try to avoid awkward silences. Really make anattempt to get to know the person you’re dating. It’s ok to throw a few jokes in there, or have a drink to calm your nerves.
3. Have a backup/escape plan.
Ok if the vibe just isn’t there and this person is just freaking you out, you have every right to end the night early! Maybe they are too flirty, too touchy, or just too aggressive. If your intuition is screaming at you to run for the hills, it may be the move you should make. Your safety is the number one priority here! One thing that I used to do is text a friend or family member before my date telling them who I’d be with and where we were going (you can even make it better by sending a drop-pin of your location) just in case of an emergency.
4. Try ending on a good note.
If you are fully aware that the date is a lost cause but you still want to get out of the date without seeming mean, you could set a deadline. Tell them you have another engagement to attend or that something suddenly came up. No harm, no foul. Just try leaving on a high note. You never know, in another time or place you two could end up having an amazing date and possible future together!