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Relationships

Female Proposals – Are They Ever a Good Idea?

With holiday the holiday season finally over, I’m sure there are plenty of new engagements as well. Being the hopeless romantic that I am, I always love seeing the different types of proposals people come up with to surprise their partners. That being said, I can’t help but feel a little uncomfortable whenever I see a woman getting down on one knee to propose to a man.

Getting engaged is a solid way to advance your relationship. Traditionally speaking, it’s a way for the man to signify and tell the woman he loves that he is ready for a future with her. Family and friends typically can’t contain their excitement. However, when a woman proposes, a negative stigma follows her. Things like – “She’s aggressive,” or “She’s desperate,” often cross people’s minds when it happens. This is a topic that I’ve always found to be extremely interesting. With the rise in women’s empowerment and equality in gender roles, it’s safe to assume that female proposals will also become a social norm, right? Wrong. Despite the overall progression of society, some traditions still hold strong, including the idea that the man should be the one proposing.

So I have to ask you – are female proposals a good idea? I think it depends on the person you ask. I asked some male friends what they thought about being proposed to by a woman. Most of them believed that proposing was their responsibility, and a woman doing so is not only emasculating, but they’d feel like they were being rushed into something they may not be ready for. Because to them – when they are ready to ask, they will. That being said, I also understand that some people need a little push. But I’m not sure if getting down on one knee is the answer ladies. I just think of Chrissy Lampkin proposing to her boyfriend of ten years (or more), rapper Jim Jones. She surprised him in a room full of friends and family and it just looked extremely awkward. That was seven years ago, and news has it that they only recently got married (according to rumors that haven’t been confirmed) after a series of breakups and reconciliations. Of course not every proposal is the same, but it is quite risky if you ask me.

I like to think of myself as a modern woman that appreciates certain traditions. Maybe it was my upbringing, or maybe because I like fairy tales (shoot me). But I can’t say that I disagree with what these guys said. Of course, every relationship is different and what works for one may not work for another. I think the vital key here is to know your partner and most importantly communicate. Figure out what it is you both want and what both of your feelings are about marriage and getting engaged. Although proposing to a man is not my style, I admire the courage of the women that do. There is something extremely admirable about knowing what you want and pursuing it. If proposing works for you ladies, I’d say go for it!

What do you think about female proposals?

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13 Comments

  • Reply
    Ciara kate
    January 25, 2018 at 3:43 pm

    My thoughts on this are super biased. Like you said, for me it’s a symbol that a man is ready to spend his life with you and there’s something very masculine and strong about a man getting on his knee to propose so to see a woman doing it, im so against it

  • Reply
    empowerandhelp
    January 26, 2018 at 4:26 pm

    Not sure why this is even a question in this century ? Proposal is a symbol you are ready or you both are ready 🙂

  • Reply
    Elizabeth O
    January 26, 2018 at 6:22 pm

    Personally I think love is love, and for me it wouldn’t matter if I proposed or my partner. If we wanted to be together then it really wouldn’t matter 🙂

  • Reply
    Apolline Adiju
    January 26, 2018 at 9:07 pm

    To me love is love and I don’t find any problems with a lady proposing to her man. What matters is if the love is there and you guys are happy together.

  • Reply
    Emily Leary
    January 27, 2018 at 4:41 am

    I think they’re a great idea, why not go for what you want? 🙂

  • Reply
    Evelyn Foreman
    January 27, 2018 at 10:22 am

    Great points! I don’t think relationships are a one size fits all. This question (for me) depends on the couple & their dynamic. Marriage after all, is a long haul and an inter-relationship that has a delicate balance and flow.

  • Reply
    mily jain
    January 27, 2018 at 10:34 am

    Yes ofcourse why should there be any difference..In this age all that matters is true love and not who proposes to whom..

  • Reply
    Luci
    January 27, 2018 at 7:24 pm

    I think that female proposals is a okay. If you are in a relationship with someone I don’t think it should matter who proposes. If you love someone if shouldn’t matter.

  • Reply
    Karolina
    January 27, 2018 at 11:30 pm

    I think people should do what they feel is right for them. I’m not sure I’d propose, but then again -when the time comes people just know what the want:)

  • Reply
    Pooja k
    January 27, 2018 at 11:56 pm

    Well, love is love whosoever will do doesnt matter as it is the beginning of that beautiful long journey where both are ewually sharing the love.

  • Reply
    vasundhra
    January 28, 2018 at 2:01 am

    I think that it is important to express your feelings in love and it doesn’t matter if a female or a male proposes. Love is love!

  • Reply
    Ari
    January 30, 2018 at 3:49 am

    I’m not sure I think it matters who does the proposal. I think the most important thing is being on the same page as your partner. It shouldn’t be emasculating.

  • Reply
    Ashley
    January 31, 2018 at 2:28 pm

    With many Black Women being heads of households (financially) it only makes sense that we would see a shift in this change as well. Women are gaining their power and now we have options to chose who we want, not so much the other way around. It sounds so different because we aren’t used to it (yet).

    SN: I’m a little traditional so I prob would not propose. However, I can see why one would.

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