Oh No She Didn’t…

Ladies, ladies, ladies – I have a serious bone to pick with some of you! (Keyword being SOME). I think I’m pretty justified in saying that a lot comes with being a woman; we must wear many hats and play many roles while dealing with cramps, PMS and other things. I commend you all because honestly you’ve been out here making major moves and simply slaying while doing it. From the mothers, to the students, entrepreneurs, the go-getters and GOAL diggers – I see you girls!

I can honestly say I’ve been most inspired by women making boss moves and I thank you all for that. As I briefly explained in my Dating Ms. Independent post, we can have it all (love, career, etc.)! Unfortunately, it seems that no matter how far we’ve come, haters are going to hate. I guess that comes with the territory right? Recent events (the election amongst other things) have shown that women still have a ways to go as far as women’s rights and getting some damn respect is concerned. With that being said, I can’t help but be baffled at the number of women that so eagerly and willfully bash other women, especially when it’s to appeal to men! I mean really, what’s up with that sis?

Why We Need to Stop the Cattiness

As I stated earlier, women have a lot to deal with and balance. No we’re not all going to like or understand each other, but I thought that having a mutual respect for our womanhood was something that we all could agree on. (QUEUE – I’m Every Woman). Sadly, I was mistaken. I’ll give you an example. Have you ever scrolled your social media and come across a man bashing a woman? Maybe she dumped him, maybe he dumped her, maybe she wronged him, etc. (Or most recently, when Karrueche Tran posted a pic of herself in a bikini.) Do you ever stop and read the comments?

I have, and I was extremely disappointed. What I’ve seen on numerous occasions is other women coming in droves to ridicule, insult, and bash another female (who I’m assuming they’ve never met in most cases) for a shitload of reasons. Trust me – it happens way too much for comfort.

I was instantly curious as to why this was happening and why it seems to happen so often. I’ve come to the following conclusions: they’re either trying to impress a guy, are determined to prove that they’re the polar opposite of their target, or they dislike themselves so much that they pounce on the opportunity to tear another woman down. I pondered this for about two seconds before concluding that all reasons are a crock of shit and you (if you’re guilty of this) need to do better!

A friend of mine said it best – women are becoming the new misogynists. And based on the recent behavior of quite a few… it seems that she’s right. That’s a huge no-no ladies! We still have so much progress to make as far as our fight for equality and femininity is concerned. Ain’t no time for that nonsense! Here’s the thing – we aren’t all going to agree on everything. It’s simply not possible. But just because you don’t like or agree with what the next woman does or how she looks, doesn’t give you the ok to bash her – especially in front of an audience. Call me crazy, but that just gives dudes that behave that way encouragement to continue with their foolishness.

In Conclusion

I’m sure most of us have slipped up and said some not so nice things about the next woman. No one is perfect and we can all learn from our mistakes. But if you’ve made it a habit of doing this – please take a moment and reflect on why you do it and why you think it’s ok. I hate to break it to you girl, but you have some deeper issues to address! We are so much stronger when we have a united front. So let this female misogynist thing die out immediately, because it’s so not cute!

1. Her side, His side and The truth!

More often than not, you’re never going to know the full story. So don’t be so quick to judge someone else’s situation.

2. Hurt people hurt people!

Newsflash – your eagerness to ridicule someone only exposes your own insecurities. Trust me, if you were really secure in who you are and what you stand for… you wouldn’t be worrying about what the next person is doing or have the time to bash them.

3. Keep it cute or put it on mute!

As one of my favorite Youtubbers Chris Crocker once said. Yes it’s that simple! If you don’t have anything nice to say than don’t say anything at all.

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Check out my new novel Dilemmas Of a Damsel – now available on Amazon!


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  • Reply
    Kelly Masotta
    August 23, 2017 at 2:02 am

    Great post! This has inspired me as to some new content ideas for my own site. I will surly be coming back to read more. #yougogirl

    • Reply
      Monique Elise
      August 23, 2017 at 5:24 pm

      Amazing!!! I’m so glad you found some inspiration on my page! Thank you so much for reading <3 xoxo!

  • Reply
    August 21, 2017 at 10:14 pm

    This is so damn true- sad to say. But thank you for sharing let’s make it better!

    • Reply
      Monique Elise
      August 22, 2017 at 11:17 pm

      Thanks for reading love! And I am so down to make some changes! xoxo

  • Reply
    August 21, 2017 at 2:05 pm

    As a man, I’m a bit afraid to comment on this, but I completely agree. Women often bash each other for no reason with their Hera Complex. In reality, you should be bashing us guys or whoever is the guilty one. Actually, we should all together bash the guilty one or even better, stand above whatever is happening and be better people.

    • Reply
      Monique Elise
      August 22, 2017 at 11:17 pm

      It’s so refreshing to get the male perspective! I know you guys look at us and just shake your heads when we pull the claws out! Thanks for reading <3

  • Reply
    August 21, 2017 at 1:12 pm

    This is wonderful! I have always been envious that guys can stick together and move on from the drama! Woman tend to hold grudges and compete! I am finding as I get older that good friends are hard to come by. However, if you find a good friend…. Don’t let them go! ❤️

    • Reply
      Monique Elise
      August 22, 2017 at 11:16 pm

      So true! It really makes me sad. We can have our differences but the cattiness has to stop!

  • Reply
    August 19, 2017 at 9:38 pm

    Interesting points.

    • Reply
      Monique Elise
      August 22, 2017 at 11:15 pm

      Thanks for reading!

  • Reply
    Samantha Lowery
    August 17, 2017 at 1:52 pm

    Monique Elise….speaking truth young lady! It is truly appalling when women tear each other down instead of supporting, encouraging and inspiring to be their best selves. Let’s all embrace our phenomenal womanhood! Reach one teach one!

    • Reply
      Monique Elise
      August 18, 2017 at 6:53 pm

      Yes, I agree. Thank you!

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